Guys, I’m watching Dr Phil again (not sure why that always gets me thinking about life and in turn about writing a blog post)! I’m rusty as it has been a while but here goes 🙂
I’m at home over Christmas and my Mum has recorded a whole bunch of episodes and we are watching a repeat from about a month ago. This episode is devastating and has lead me to several conclusions which I will get to but I can hear you all asking what the episode is about so I’ll explain that first.
It is a story about a mother who tried to kill herself and her daughter, and at first it sounds absolutely horrible, which it is!! But as the episode goes on a completely heartbreaking tale unfolds. This child is highly Autistic and extremely violent. This child beats up her mother and younger sister every 6 minutes. This child has knocked her mother unconscious twice, broken her bones and given her bruises. This child is a child. This child has no control. This child is scared.
Dr Phil interviews the mother in jail and she explains that she was trying to take them both to a better place so her youngest daughter would be safe, so her child with autism would be freed and because she was scared her daughter would eventually kill her. What a horrible, scary situation!
I cannot relate to this situation but I could see the pain, regret and love on this mother’s face. I could see she truly had run out of options and had lost hope, she said many times she loved her daughter so much and she just wanted to free her. You could see on her face how much she loved her daughter.
Now, I am not a parent and I am not an expert (not even close!) but I have seen a couple of children with Autism as an Early Childhood Educator over the last year or so. I have seen that they just cannot control their emotions and reactions the way that we generally can, when something changes or sneaks up on them they get scared and react in a way we wouldn’t.
My ‘Dr Phil conclusions’ came when I saw (through my tears) a video of this child physically beating her mother, this then faded into a montage of photographs of a mother and daughter who were friends, best friends. I could see that this mother just wanted to love her child and for her child to know that – and this is what I want for you to get out of my lazy Friday night – love your children, love you family, love yourself.
Your child needs to know that, no matter what, they are loved. I am not trying to lecture you (here I am, I’m a teacher, I know everything – not even! I know nothing!) I know you try your hardest and even when you are sleep deprived and haven’t eaten because you’ve been cleaning up snot and poo and vomit, you may get cranky or be short tempered. But you still love them! Just take a minute, breathe and love on them.
I am already passionate about children and ensuring they have the best life possible! I have learnt this year that it is so important for them to know they are special – even those who are a bit tougher to love! Children with Autism fall on a spectrum, some of them you wouldn’t know they have anything different about them and others struggle to cope with with many aspects of life. If you are a parent of an Autistic child, thank you! You are an amazing human being!
Going into this weekend and the coming year – show love – to your family, your children, your friends, your neighbours and those you encounter throughout your travels. You don’t know their story, their struggles, their life. We should never judge someone as we have no idea what their journey is! All we can do is pray!